Funny Military Jokes
Attention, our funny military jokes are sure to square you away.
- What’s the main mission of the Marines? To make sure the Army never get their feet wet.
- The man who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a seasoned veteran.
- Land-mines cost an arm and a leg these days.
- Trench warfare should always be a last ditch effort.
- When William joined the Army, he didn’t appreciate the phrase, “fire at will”.
- You would think that being a submarine captain would pay well, but I hear they can’t keep their heads above water.
- Where does a General keep his Armies? In his sleevies!
- Those who wear sleeveless shirts like to defend the right to bare arms.
- How do you know when someone is a Marine? They tell you.
- What’s the difference between God and fighter pilots? God doesn’t think he’s a fighter pilot.
- What happened when the soldier went into an enemy bar? He got bombed.
- How do you knock out a marine? Throw sand at the wall and tell him to hit the beach!
- Those who aim torpedoes are always ready to press charges.
- When I was in the army, I got my arms shot off. But I shouldered on anyway.
- Why does the Navy keep Marines on their ships? Because sheep would be too obvious.
Please share your favorite military jokes in the comments.