I’m not going to say my wife is a bad cook but she does use the smoke alarm as a timer.
What do they call the hunger games in France?
Battle royale with cheese.
Why does Mr. T drive a Tesla?
Because he pities the fuel.
They really should stock ATM’s better.
I went to 5 different ones today and they all said insufficient funds.
What do you call a hippies’ wife?
It’s very rare that a defibrillator fails.
Bet when it does, no one is shocked.
Did you know you can’t run in campgrounds?
You can only ran, because it’s past tents
What’s the key to making a good mailman joke?
People treat me like god.
They ignore my existence until they need something.
How many cars does it take to fill up a parking garage?